Back to The Forest

I leave today to live in a forest community for a year (as of now). No. It is not an attempt at running away from "my life". I do not intend to cause any suspicion among jobless minds with this decision of mine, and so do not take the pain of wondering why i do this.

It is not any kind of psycho aashram that i have joined.

It is not a rave party hide out hub whatever place.

It is not a free life (free booze, free love, free dope, ) place.

It is not a place where wanna-be'ish kids go to make others feel small.

It is definitely not a place with no values or goals. (come to think of it, it is one place that has some objective!)
what it is, is a forest community. i wont try and dissect it to tiny pieces, lest u forget the holistic view. It is a place that believes in afforestation, community living and many such things which are of nobody's concern today. If you are smirking to yourself at your well paid desk sucking job, im sorry for you! I know my life will have those days too, but atleast i do not wish to start my life doing things i absolutely abhor. i was given the chance of being associated with this project, and rest assured i took it with all my heart and mind. My soul is too fickle to be dedicated to any one thing in life, and so i shall say that a part of my soul is happy about this too!
April 20, i leave to the forest that is about 15 kms from pondi. I plan to live there, doing what we do, eating what we eat, living how we live for a year. I do intend to blog more often than i have been in the recent past, but i am not sure if i will have access. I leave behind things and people, situations and encounters that give me no reason to be happy about leaving them. But i go only because i chose to, and i want to. I hope the forest teaches me ME and brings to life those sides of me that have only breathed in the darkness of my soul, lest they be misjudged! I wish you all well. hugs! :-)
"May there be many more forests to grow people."

when life whispered...

I'm too "your's ", too soon,
I'm "your's too", although...
I'm too close to soon,
Not be your's as well!

And then I smile...

Behold! A new dawn in my life!
Oh! What a View! Oh! What a Sight!
Ne'er has this feeling seen me 'fore;
Ne'er have I been in such a flight.
Oh! What, I wonder, is in store!
My smiles they soar, with (the) cheering rays;
My heart it knows a language new!
In this new day, there is no guard;
With this new dawn, come fears few.
This day is mine, and of the Bard!
With dawn comes dusk, which will but dawn,
with newer rays and eager birds!
I feel the language of my heart, (will)
with every meet, learn newer words...
I'm glad this day did make a start!
The way is new, direction is naught-
for, (the) rays that come my way, but hide;
to hit me then when clouds-they jeer...
And thunders hit, and wake the Tide,
The rays they lift my mood.They cheer...
My smiles they soar, with (these) cheering rays!
My heart it loves this language new!
In this new day, there is the Bard.
With this new dawn come frowns so few!
This day is mine! I have no guard!
;-)

In the eyes of eternity

The batting of a thousand 'lashes proclaim

the birth of a tear drop... dying

a sad death, holding in its heart

an ocean of pain, anguish and despair, for-

We are away, we are far

That distance dances ahead of us

for what seems like aeons, and

when it has fallen- the tear, i know

you will be here.

To kill the birth of another...

A Leaf from the Zenith

Of what benefit to me is This-
that I know is of no consequence?
Of what kind is this new Bliss,
that fills me with a promise intense!

In what garb does It appear,
and how true It is-who knows!?
There is but joy, not one fear;
Certainty in big lights-glows!

And eternal alliance of thoughts that merge.
And aware situation of unknown smiles.
A ready surrender to a deathly roar.
No fingers to raise. No accuses to face.

An aesthetic eye for a beautiful soul.
An absolute hedonistic drive as the end.
A powerful attempt at defying the "set".
No lust for pain.No ends to the pleasure.

I enter the Abyss, and I fall and I fall.
I enter the Zenith and I crawl and I crawl.

here and there...this and that..

stuff that i have "scribbled" in books, train tickets, phone bills, and what have you's over
the past months only to compile here! some are random, some inspired, some empathetic,
some accusative, some meant only for that moment, and some being just me-honest.

Demons are the idols
& ideals are long gone,
is this the time and place where,
oh god! i was to be born!
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If promiscuity is so cool
why do we shun the whores?
why need i guard the keys when,
there are no moral doors?
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he who can risk it all
and speak for what is true
shan't ever fear his fall
but look towards horizons new
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he who finds his way
to the heart of issues bold
shall find his happy day
sooner than he is told!
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"Nature has placed mankind under the governance of two sovereign Masters- Pain and
Pleasure." -Jeremy 'The Utilitarian' Bentham
wtf!!! wahwah! i lovvvvve it!!!!
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Loss... is just an emotion away... a gesture away... what was whole can shred itself to
unstitchable tatters in just the space of an emotion-right or wrong, deserved or not.
Change is the only companion i'll have. and in it, i see constant assurance. I change, as do
my views, my opinions, my emotions, friends, beliefs, principles, my soul, my body, my
moods, my goals, my fantasies, my desires, my plans, my path, my purpose, my days my
nights,, my perspective, my all. I change. And my opinion about you changes, so you
change. And given that you change anyways, my opinion about the new you changes, and
change just keeps outdoing itself shamelessly, purposely.
All will change
all Will shall go
Gone will be All
When Change-it Wills.
Why stop it at all?
Don't even try
for the 'try' will triumph
when Change-it wills.
Don't dare or care
attaching depth
to Life or in Lives
for change they will.
And when all it wills
is to change, stay put!
For in Its change
is your all and more.
Life changes All
All changes will
butmake a life.
Life makes you live
through the changes it wills.
Life may change will
to give you all
you may not ask
but change you too will!
And what you will
changes as well!
Oh! Change is life's all!
and Life's will shall change!
And that's how you live!
wrote it on a particularly dramatically melancholic day. Possibly an isolated event in my
life, and hence the redundent sweetness of words!!lol!
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i keep my own as my own
and seek my own in few
when time comes for me to choose
will Life then treat me wrong?
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Nothing empowers me with as much strength of character as does the process of choosing
between a much needed selfishness and an expected selflessness...
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You either need a Friend, or clarity of thought.
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